Welcome to Stepdivas!

This group is for stepmoms who do not have biological children. This means that when you are granted membership to the forums here, you have no children of your own. However, if you should become pregnant and have children of your own, you will not be removed from this site. We understand that relationships will be formed here and we do not aim to take those away. However, when you do have children of your own, it is important that you refrain from using the statement "it's different when they're your own". We all know that to be true. Those members who have children after they have joined will be welcome to stay, but sadly, we ask that those who do have children already join many of us in friendship and support at a site such as www.secondwivescafe.com

Privacy is of absolute importance here. While it would be alright to share certain jokes with your family (DH), and to use the support you find here to help you in your home relationships, we request that things that are clearly very personal (for example: personal reflections in posts and photos posted in the photo area, or member pages) be strictly for the use and viewing of members.

It is important thatt all new members are clear that this board is designed to serve a specific "set" of stepmoms...those who do not have biological children. As stepmoms who do not have biological children we recognize that we do not have the same emotions and understanding that women who have given birth do. We realize that we face unique challenges and we seek to do the best that we can in our roles as stepmom. It is for this reason that we have sought the company, companionship and support of other stepmoms who do not have biological children.

We do not set out to be elitist in this philosophy, nor do we feel that we are above or below those who do have children... we just understand one fundamental thing, being a stepmom is not like being a mom, and we understand very clearly that "it's different when they're your own"... it has to be.

All we ask is that we be respected in our needs, and in our desire to be the best stepmoms we can possibly be.

I started this site three years ago because I sought specific support, and I believe in the necessity of it as a stepmom who does not have biological children. This site changed my life in ways that general stepmom and stepfamily sites were unable to, in ways that counseling sessions designed for this specific situation were unable to.

For these reasons, I strive to maintain the integrity of this site.

I feel it is critical that we support one another. This may at times mean that we refrain from comparing our circumstances. There are infinite combinations that come into play in stepfamilies. For me to tell any other stepmother that their stepchild is going to turn out just like my stepchild is probably not a reasonable conclusion to draw. The behaviours of the children may be similar, but it is almost certain that their life histories are not. Each of us brings different knowledge to the forum, different experiences and different opinions. It is of utmost importance that we share these in the most constructive manner possible, and do our best to offer hope to one another.

I believe in supporting stepmoms, but I will emphasize that the goal of this site is to support stepmoms who do not have biological children.

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